The Soft Start

Welcome to The Soft Start

If you’ve tried the New Year, New You thing before and you’ve ended up here — firstly, welcome. And secondly, take a deep breath. Your body has led you here because she needs something different.

We’re surrounded by a constant push toward perfection, and it can feel like the noise gets louder as we age. There’s so much emphasis on bio-hacking our way into the most optimised version of ourselves, on warding off every symptom or imperfection with some kind of wellness protocol. All of this keeps us in a constant state of doing — and spending.

My belief is that this pursuit of perfection is a natural response to body grief — when your body changes and you miss how it used to be, or the dream you once had for it.

Body grief can show up with ageing, illness, childbirth, injury, menopause, weight gain, fatigue, and loss. It can even surface when you see someone else’s body change — like when a favourite celebrity suddenly loses a lot of weight.

Body grief often manifests as yearning for a past self, sadness about looking or feeling different, or frustration with new symptoms.

And layered on top of this is the constant noise of optimisation — take this supplement or drug, wear this weighted vest, eat this much protein. It can start to feel like it’s our fault we feel this way, as if we’re simply not doing enough.

In reality, there are two forces at play:

We all age naturally. This is a privilege — but we’re taught to believe there’s something wrong with it.

And large industries profit from that discomfort, making money from our dissatisfaction.

So let’s consider how we’d treat a friend who is grieving the loss of a loved one. You wouldn’t push her to do everything possible to get that person back — because that’s impossible. Instead, you’d offer space, care, and gentleness. You’d want her to feel nurtured, loved, and supported.

That’s what your body is craving too. Not a push back into a past that’s no longer possible, but gentler care for who you are now.

Today, let’s give ourselves permission to begin — softly — to accept ourselves as we are, and to start listening to what our bodies are actually asking for, rather than what everyone else says they “need”.

And if part of that includes grieving what once was, or the dreams you had for your body, that’s okay too.

Today’s practice: Past, present, future you.